le bruit blanc de l'été

Dimanche 13 octobre 2013 à 21:14

"Tu ne te souviens de moi que dans tes sursauts d'ivresse"

Glisse encore longtemps, ta tentation de me séduire. Et te raccrocher à moi, quand l'ivresse te délit soudain. Je ne te lis pas. Et tu envoies les murmures des chansons qui nous ont rythmés et nous modèlent toujours. Tu m'envoies cela. Je ne sais jamais abandonner l'effort de comprendre. Qu'est ce que nous sommes ? Des barques encore à la dérive qui se regardent au coin de l'oeil, lorsque le lac est calme ?

Et entre cela, le silence absolu. Et cette impression que tu es profondément inatteignable, au sens le plus pratique du terme. Injoignable.
(Alors qu'on ne sait pas quoi foutre de tout ce qui nous lie).
C'est ça le paradoxe: ces liens, invisibles. Présents-absents.
Et la peur de la présence, peut-être ?

"Pas vu les feuilles venir Pas vu les feuilles tomber Qu'es-tu venu me dire? Pourquoi es-tu passé?"
" Pourquoi es-tu venuComment te souvenais tu Que j'étais encore là?"

Et j'ai peur de te lire.
Et retrouver nos messages alors que j'étais tellement ivre, et toi aussi. Et ton agressivité (que fait-elle là, bordel ?). Tes cris: pourquoi Sciences Po ?
Ton esprit est en mille errances, et je suis à recoller les morceaux
Mais le plus terrible, c'est la spirale automatique de mon propre esprit, qui cherche l'air. Et les réponses abandonnées. Et qui te cherche d'un coup (comme tout un chacun).

A quoi joues-tu ? Qui es-tu, maintenant ?
Cette tentation à chaque fois repétée de tenter de répondre. De chercher.
A chaque entre-vue, la dynamique lourde de la tentation, de retrouver le moyen de te comprendre.


2 murmures

Murmures

Chuchoter à l'oreille

Par Champi-Haine le Lundi 14 octobre 2013 à 12:00
Superbe d'émotions vraies. Le fouillis des questions trouve réponse dans mon oreille.

<3
Par sa le Jeudi 7 novembre 2024 à 7:53
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